Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Random hatred

Hi. I’m The Professor and I judge people. (This is really given by way of background because, honestly, it’s not really changing any time soon….) Today’s judgment comes in the form of a random hatred for people with customized license plates. Ok, it’s not really random because I don’t hate everyone with customized license plates…just those with stupid ones. I mean, if you’re going to pay a lot of extra money for a special license plate could you try not to make it say, “I’m an a**hole”? We all know you kind of are for paying the extra money in the first place so it’s not really necessary to flaunt it by including words like VIP or cool or great (or some variation thereof since it has to fit on a license plate). Here’s the bottom line – if you feel the need to pay the government extra money to advertise by way of your license plate how great and cool and special you are, you’re not.

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Best of 2008

  1. Bug in reporter's mouth video
  2. Gilligan 2.0 riding the Greyhound for a booty call
  3. Finding out the Professor attended Dragcon
  4. Diego rants
  5. Mrs. Howell and her neighbors (from both places)
  6. Mrs. Howell and the Bjorn
  7. Yellowman sticking to the ceiling
  8. Mrs. Howell's Loft Confession
  9. Gilligan's daily talks with his "dietitian"
  10. Skipper's new horse
  11. The Professor's anti-religion rant
  12. Gilligan 2.0 telling everyone we needed HDTVs by Feb 09
  13. Mrs. Howell couldn't pronounce "saliva"
  14. Infamous dates (Mrs. Howell of course)
  15. Gilligan setting Mrs. Howell up on dates with Walter
  16. Elliot the dishwasher being introduced
  17. The shutdown of Virtual Fight Club
  18. The Professor getting the boot
  19. Mrs. Howell getting the stapler
  20. OBAMA for Prez!!!!!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008


Let's pour out a 40 for our girl...

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Hang up the phone - part two

Mrs. Howell's rant reminded me of something I've been meaning to share. I, as many people know, am a huge fan of Dunkin' Donuts coffee and often walk to the nearby Dunkin' for an afternoon pick-me-up. Recently the store manager posted a sign asking everyone to be courteous and hang up the cell phones when at the counter. I can respect that. It would be annoying to have to compete for attention with the cell phone in order to do your job, and I know it would be difficult to try to figure out who the person is actually talking to – you or the person on the cell phone. The irony here, though? The manager of the store is almost always on her cell phone when she's taking someone’s order...

Hang up the phone!

When you take your child out for a special treat (breakfast, lunch, ice cream, etc.) talk to your child not to your buddy on the cell phone. Doesn't that defeat the whole purpose? I'm just sayin.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

A Town Held Hostage - Day 3

So apparently Nick's OLYMPIC license plate was swiped from the parking garage across the street (aka the Marietta St. Shooting Gallery).
Based on a phone interview with the victim, the kidnapping occurred three days ago.
No reward has been offered yet (and the chances of me returning it without a reward are pretty damn slim)... But, seriously, Westside Rants will be holding a vigil every day until his license plate is returned - unharmed.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008